CHICAGO — Ousted Illinois Gov. Rod Blagojevich says he’s “blacker than Barack Obama” and tells Esquire magazine that he was a real person in a political arena dominated by phonies.

Blagojevich, referring to the president as “this guy,” says Obama was elected based simply on hope.

“What the (expletive)? Everything he’s saying’s on the teleprompter,” Blagojevich told the magazine for a story in its February issue, which hits newsstands Jan. 19.

“I’m blacker than Barack Obama. I shined shoes. I grew up in a five-room apartment. My father had a little laundromat in a black community not far from where we lived,” Blagojevich said. “I saw it all growing up.”

The White House refused to comment.

The twice-elected Democrat was impeached and removed from office last year after federal prosecutors arrested him on corruption charges that included trying to sell Obama’s old U.S. Senate seat. He has pleaded not guilty.(Source)

I know President Obama has to live and uphold the standards of the Office of the President, but I wish this once we could all vote to allow him to punch Rod Blagojevich in the face.  And if that’s not possible, then I say we at least let Michelle kick him in the nuts a couple of times.  Seriously, this guy is an attention whore and I really shouldn’t even be doing this, but this interview he did with Esquire is so offensive I had to say something.  Rod is doing what most black people hate about white people.  He’s using a modified “But I have black friends” excuse.  So because your father had a laundromat in a black community that gives you a pass in the black community?  Even worse is him saying that he grew up poor and that somehow, that makes him “black”.  So being poor is now a trait of black people Rod?  Seriously, fuck this guy.  He’s just saying shit now to take attention away from the fact that he tried to illegally sell a Senate seat.

I also want to point out that people like Joe Scarborough will probably ignore how fellow Democrats blast Blagojevich for his comments because it doesn’t fit their narrative that Democrats ignore or forgive fellow Democrats that say racially insensitive things.  See, unlike Harry Reid’s comments, Blagos were meant to be offensive.  Reid, while making a stupid statement, wasn’t intentionally trying to stir the racial pot.  There is a difference folks.

So you’ve probably heard the big uproar over Facebook’s changes to it’s Terms of Service.  Basically they changed their ToS to say that they reserve the rights to any content posted on Facebook and that even if you delete your account, they still hold on to that content.  People protested and got up in arms and so as of this morning Facebook has reinstated their previous ToS while they “evaluate” how to proceed.  Look, I’m all for privacy but I think people here are bitching about nothing.  Once something is posted online, you can kiss your privacy goodbye.  It’s no longer your content but in essence public domain.  The question should be not whether Facebook holds on to your content but what their plans are to deal with it.  When I’m online give me security because I’ve already forfeited a lot of my privacy.  See, everyone wants to have automation and predictive human intelligence software, but then they claim to also want complete privacy.  Sorry, but it doesn’t work that way.  If you want the house that knows you want a cheese burger and cooks it for you when you walk in the door, someone will have to develop software to store your likes and habits in order to make that prediction.  And they’ll also need toe likes and habits of all your friends or people that have the same interests as you.  Also, let’s be real…this is par for the course for Facebook.  I read the ToS and was thought to myself “this is new?”.  When people “deleted” their Facebook accounts and then reactivated a couple months later, didn’t anyone else think it was suspicious how all their pictures reappeared immediately?  And deleting your account also doesn’t delete the pictures you were tagged in by friends titled “How we got drunk and whored out on a cruise.”  How about you don’t whore out around cameras…then you don’t have to worry about your shit being posted.  But like I said, Facebook has reinstated their old ToS for now.  They’ll probably ease it back in later on down the line like they normally do.  It’s like trying to have sex with a virgin.  You gotta ease it in…with lube.  I know that sounds graphic but that’s the only way to describe the ways that Facebook has screwed us before (Mini-feeds, Beacon, New Facebook, etc etc etc).  And each time we complain and then they say “We’re sorry” and then they lube up and continue to screw us and we take it…cause we’re addicted…WTF

I think it’s pretty safe to say that Lindsey Lohan is on that crack.  That Whitney & Bobby.  The Winehouse.  Look at her.  She looks like a skeleton in a sun dress.  And then she has the nerve to try to defend herself by saying “I ate a Big Mac yesterday”…WTH…was that your meal for the first half of 2009.  I know white people love their women rail thin, with no hips or ass but damn…having sex with her could be a health risk.  She says the weight loss isn’t intentional.  Bitch please.  No one loses weight like they lose their keys.  “Oops…I forgot to eat for the last month.”…WTF

I knew I didn’t like Roland Burris for a reason and now it seems I was right.  Seems that Senator Burris left out the fact that he tried to fundraise for Former Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich.  Some people were mad at me for not jumping behind and supporting Burris but now it’s becoming clear why not.  Even if there’s no wrong doing here…it just looks bad and in politics it’s all about perception.  Having the guy with his own mausoleum giving homage to himself paired up with a guy who wears his hair piece backwards isn’t going to have a happy ending…WTF

*Chris Brown/Rihanna Update…sorta*
First up, rumors are swirling that Rihanna and her people aren’t happy with Chris Brown’s apology.  They make a good point by saying how can he say he’s sorry but still not admit what he did?    I know if I was innocent I wouldn’t be apologizing for nothing.  It goes back to what I said on the podcast, you can’t fuck up and then go to God afterwards.  How about you consult with Jesus before you decide to punch your girlfriend in the face (or bite her or whatever he did).  Deciding to consult with God after you messed up is like putting the condom on after you busted in the disease ridden third world Asian hooker…WTF

So I don’t know how I missed this last week but apparently Terrence Howard came out and tried to defend Chris Brown.  Here’s the video and below is the text of what he said when asked to comment on the situation:

“It’s just life, man. Chris is a great guy, man. He’ll be all right. And Rihanna knows he loves her, you know? They’ll be alright. ‘Cause everybody gotta get out of the way.”

Yeah, you’re right Terrence…beating your girlfriend is the proper way to say I Love You.  I know I go home and punch my mom and grandmother in the face before I sit down for dinner on Christmas day.  But I’ve now been given new insight into why Terrence would make such a bone headed statement.  Turns out Terrence himself is a member of W.B.A. (Woman Beaters Anonymous).  The Smoking Gun has posted information on his 2001 arrest for domestic abuse:

While McCommas was speaking with a police dispatcher, Howard “showed up at the victim’s residence and began breaking the door down.” McCommas ran to the rear of the house and into the backyard. Howard then “broke the front door down and ran through the screen door in the kitchen. Howard then grabbed the victim’s left arm and punched her twice with a closed fist in the left side of the face.” The attack was broken up by Howard’s brother, who responded to McCommas’s house after he “saw Howard storm out of their house to go to the victim’s house.” When a Whitemarsh cop responded to the scene, Howard admitted, “I broke the door down and hit my wife.” A second officer noted there was “fresh damage to the front door and marks on the victim’s face and arm from being struck.”

So now my theory has changed.  Terrence is trying to show support for his fellow light skinned brother.  See, since he’s been dropped the Iron Man franchise…dude needs work.  Cuban Gooding Jr. scored a mini-comeback with Ben Carson and Terrence needs something.  You know he jumped into the music world and so maybe he’s looking to do a duet with Chris Brown.  I can see it now.  A song called “I Beat You Cause I Love You“…WTF

Ryce is finally back from her cruise, but she has the bird flu (damn Asians). She’s a little pissed that Dylan skipped out on the show and forced her sick ass to come down because of chicken. She talks about her cruise and the secret to smuggling alcohol onto the boat. Kriss on the other hand is a little pissed at lazy strippers. Roland Burris and Governor Blagojevich continue to show why Illinois politics minus President Barack Obama is a complete clown show. A mutal friend sends out an email about a 40 year old loser who sends out a 7 minute speech with his two-tone resume. Then we finish with a new segment: Tough Love for Secrettwitter. We give asshole advice to the loser that post on Secrettwitter.

We’re looking for writers for TheInsanityReport.com and guests for the Insanity Check Podcast. If you are interested, email us at KrissandTheKorean@theInsanityReport.com. Also hit us up if you’re good with graphic designs or music production (we’re looking for a new opening for the podcast). Join the Facebook Fan page or follow us on Twitter.

So Obama arrived in Washington D.C. last weekend to prepare to take the highest political office in this country, but amazingly, he wasn’t the most interesting African-American politician on his way to Washington.  Enter Roland Burris the newly appointed (by embattled Democratic Governor Rod Blagojevich) Senator for Illinois.  Quite honestly, this situation shouldn’t even be an issue.  No, Blagojevich has not been convicted of any crimes so he is technically innocent until proven guilty.  But regardless of his innocence, I think it’s clear that he was flirting with line between moral and immoral like adolescents at an underground party.  What should have happened was Burris should have said “Thanks but no thanks” to Blagojevich and waited until the investigation against the Governor or whatever solution the Illinois State Senate and Supreme Court came up with were completed.  That’s the smart and common sense thing to do.  Anyone who says otherwise is talking out of their anus.  This is not an issue about race.  Yes, with the election of Obama there are now zero African American U.S. Senators, definitely something that needs to be addressed…but that is a separate issue from the Burris appointment.  The first thing that needs to be addressed is the fact that the people of Illinois no longer have confidence in their Governor (and for good reason).  Once that is addressed, and only once that has been addressed should there then be discussions about filling the seat with an African American.

When I watched Rep. Bobby Rush come out and accuse Harry Reid of racism and “plantation politics”, I was both embarrassed and angered as an African American.  Reid has been falling over backwards to please and support President Elect Obama (who by the way, also opposed Burris’s appointment when it first occurred) and Rush wants to accuse him of racism?  It suddenly reminded me how much old civil rights leaders and members of the Congressional Black Caucus pissed me off early in the democratic primaries with their excessive use of the race card.  Don’t get me wrong, the race card is sometimes necessary.  But it’s like when you play spades.  You need to know when the 8 of Spades is more appropriate than the Ace of Spades and when sometimes you don’t play a Spade because you don’t want to cut your partner.

Roland Buriss was picked by Blagojevich solely to cause the turmoil that is going on now.  Come on.  Think about it.  You think Blagojevich picked Buriss, a 71 year old African American politician who has a history of not making it out of democratic primaries (sure, he’s never lost to a Republican just like the Lions never lost a 2008 Preseason game)  and has stated his intention to NOT run in 2010, because he was qualified? And do you think Burris accepted this position solely because of his commitment to the people of Illinois and not for his own ambitions?  If you believe that then I have a bridge in Brooklyn along with a case full of glass hammers to sell you.  Burris was picked because he was black (You saw Reid dancing on Meet the Press) and Blagojevich knew he wouldn’t turn down a U.S. Senate seat (I mean…come on…dude built his own mausoleum in memory of himself…and he’s still living).

If for some reason you still can’t see why people were kinda upset by Burris taking the Senate seat then think about this.  Let’s say Bernie Maddof wrote you a check for $100K. Would you take it?  Technically, he hasn’t been convicted of anything.  Yet we all know that if Bernie is writing you a check, chances are, that money is tainted.  I don’t care if you’re intention is to give the whole check to charity…you don’t take the money.  That’s how I feel about this Burris appointment.  Sure, he’ll be a Senator and legally it’s his right to do so.  Still, I can’t help but shake my head and think that when Malcolm X said “By any means necessary” this isn’t what he had in mind.

Kriss and Dylan are in the studio once again another hilarious and classic conversation occurs. Actually, there are a couple of shining points. Like the talk of midgets and the Witness Protection Program for Whores. Then there’s a discussion about Real New Years Resolutions…like bringing common sense back (fat people beware). Obama is impressing Kriss and Dylan and once again, Joe the Plumber is back in the news. Then the latest relationship talk: why men don’t want to cuddle.

We’re looking for writers for TheInsanityReport.com and guests for the Insanity Check Podcast. If you are interested, email us at KrissandTheKorean@theInsanityReport.com. Also hit us up if you’re good with graphic designs or music production (we’re looking for a new opening for the podcast). Join the Facebook Fan page or follow us on Twitter.

We mistakenly say during the show that this is our 42nd episode when it’s really the 43rd. We discuss leaving CP time in 2008, showing up on time to a party when you are supposed to be bringing something, setting up a draft charity for the Detroit Lions so they can redo their entire team, Gays blowing the Rick Warren-Obama issue out of proportion, Dick Cheney showing why he’s such a huge dickwad, Sarah Palin is back in the news, the continued pussification of our children and much more.

The Korean talks about her trip to New York and how she ended up in the same Wal-Mart that resulted in a man being trampled to death on Black Friday. Bush showed his agility this weekend when he ducked two shoes thrown at him by a disgruntled Iraqi reporter. Rod Blagovejich is still being defiant, the auto bailout failed, oil prices have raised slightly (meaning Dubai will still be able to make their refrigerated beach resort), 70 year old Bernie Madoff is arrested for $50 billion fraud, The Day the Eart Stood Still kinda sucked, Kriss and the Korean try to think of a Nicolas Cage movie that he didn’t cry in, Michael Jackson dresses like a gay Muslim Zorro, Chuck E Cheese leads to adults acting like fools and some dumwit white girls take a bath in a KFC sink.

We’re looking for writers for TheInsanityReport.com and guests for the Insanity Check Podcast. If you are interested, email us at KrissandTheKorean@theInsanityReport.com. Also hit us up if you’re good with graphic designs or music production (we’re looking for a new opening for the podcast). Join the Facebook Fan page or follow us on Twitter.

Kriss and Dylan are in the studio discussing several topics. First up, it’s 2008 almost 2009. Start checking your email. It’s a lame excuse to say you don’t check your email often. Kriss then gets a little controversial when discussing the topic of Jesus. Kriss and Dylan tell white people it’s okay to admit the OJ sentencing was payback. Rod Blagojevich gets greedy, Fox News is lying again, Joe the Plumber has buyer’s remorse (He’s turned into the political version of Superhead), Lexus’s holiday commercials seem a little out of touch with today’s economy, the Plaxico effect, Monkey Meat confiscated at airport and Ugandan men warned of booby trap.

Join the Facebook Fan page or follow us on Twitter

When you are Governor of the State the first African American (Hell, the first minority) elected to the highest office of this land served in as Senator…you would think you would recognize that all eyes would be on you and any other public figures from that state. Now would probably not be a good time to do something illegal. Some thing like…try to sell the President Elect’s senate seat to those interested in filling his shoes. It’s an especially REALLY, bad time when the day before you said

“I should say if anybody wants to tape my conversations, go right ahead, feel free to do it.” (we even have it on video)

Well sir…the FBI did. And they have filed a 76-page affidavit saying that they have court-authorized wiretaps over the last month of you conspiring to sell or trade the vacant Senate seat for personal benefits.

Governor Rod Blagojevich…not only are you Dumbass of the Week but you’re also a douche. Apparently while during one of his taped conversations he said

“F**k him,” Blagjoveich says of Obama during a lengthy call with top aides and his wife recorded on November 10th, “For nothing? F**k him.”

I guess he’s referring to the fact that Obama wanted him to appoint a qualified candidate to his seat and that *gasp* Obama wanted him to do it based on who was best for the job and not who was best to financially serve the Governor. The nerve of that black guy. A local Chicago reporter is saying that it might have been President Elect Obama’s Chief of Staff who blew the whistle on Blagjoveich and as crazy as that sounds it makes sense. Think about it. Usually, we find out about something like this AFTER it’s already happened. While this will surely be in the news and does seem bad for the President Elect…it could be much worse. Imagine if this came out AFTER Blagjoveich made the appointment to the Senate seat. Then you’d have basically two corrupt politicians to deal with, Blagjoveich for taking the money and then whoever he had appointed who would in essence have bought the seat. If it is Rham Emanuel who tipped the scale on this, then my hat is off to President Obama and his future Administration. I’m so used to an Administration that not only welcomes incompetence and corruption but actively hides it, I’m not sure how I’m going to react knowing that an Obama’s Administration might actually try to be honest and clean with the American People. Who knows…maybe this is just the honeymoon. Whatever it is…I can appreciate it.

Republicans are of course giddy but I really don’t know what they are happy about. Remember, Blagjoveich replaced Republican George Ryan who is currently serving a 6-year prison sentence for racketeering and fraud. WTF is going on in Illinois?

Governor Rod Blagjoveich you are the Dumbass of the Week. Happy Holiday’s Douchebag.