Kriss and Ryce talk about the Michael Jackson Memorial. Kriss has been going hard all week about people’s reactions to MJ’s death and the discussion between him and Ryce covers opinions from both sides. Other topics covered include the President’s poll numbers being down in Ohio, claims that the Stimulus package didn’t do enough and that we need another one and some disturbing news out of Pakistan about kids being sold and bought to be used as suicide bombers.

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A 52-year-old woman who took a job as an exotic dancer to help make ends meet was attacked on her first day by a jealous co-worker armed with a stiletto shoe, police said.

The suspect is described only as a black female in her late 40s. (Source)

Sign #1 that we are in a recession:  A 52 year old woman gets hired to be a stripper.  That means 2 things.  First off, it means our economy is so bad that instead of getting a second job as a Wal-Mart greeter, its actually easier and more economical to show your 52 year old tits.  And secondly it means there’s a market for 52 year old tits.  Such a market that it would cause late 40 year old tits to go into a jealous rage and want to maim.  This whole thing is disturbing.  It will only make me feel better if this is the strip club closest to the trailer park.   I would also then expect that the woman that attacked her was her cousin.

Seems like the U.S. Government isn’t the only one in the business of trying to bailout “mainstreet” and give some form of relief to every day Americans.  Jos. A. Banks apparently is having a sale where you can buy a suit for $199 and if you lose your job, they’ll refund your money but let you keep the suit.  Now isn’t that a sign of how bad the economy?  I was watching TV last night and came across this Trojan Condom commercial and I had a good laugh:

I mean, when you think about it, who better to offer a stimulus package to America than a company that makes condoms.  “Because we should ride out these hard times together.“  LOL.

I don’t have the numbers, but logic tells me that in this economic time, condom companies have to be doing well.  It’s too expensive right now to have kids and so more people are actually using condoms (Sad when this is even an option) or using Dylan’s suggestion, swallowing more.

With the stock market below 8,000, now might be a good time to invest in some decent companies at a low price for a big return.  I think I’m going to look into investing in some Trojan, Durex or LifeStyles…I could make a million dollars off of condoms.

Anyone else find it amusing that while Dick Cheney is saying “Don’t blame us for the economy” , Dana Perino is trying to say Bush should get some credit for the recent upswing in the market?  Its this kind of logic devoid fuckery that had me so livid during the last 8 years.  Say what you want about President Obama’s first couple months in office, at least he’s taken responsibility.  He flatly said “Blame me” when it came to the problems of some of his cabinet picks.  Of course, that’s a complete 180 from the Bush Administration strategy of shuffling the blame when something goes wrong and taking undeserved credit when things go good.  They did that for the War in Iraq.  Republicans now like to say that “The Surge Worked” and that former President Bush’s strategy and foreign policy have been vindicated.  The truth is, the surge DIDN’T work.  Violence lowered due to ethnic cleansing and the fact that we armed militias to fight each other.  Hence violence went down because warring factions stopped killing each other (cause there was no one left to kill) and Al Qaeda shifted its attention back to Afgahnistan.  I wouldn’t exactly call that a winning strategy or something to brag about.  Now they are doing the same shuffling with the economy.  The Bush Administration ran up a huge deficit by spending money unnecessarily on two wars and other ridiculous things and now Darth Cheney sits in his Death Star or wherever they have him holed up and try to shuffle blame on the “Global economy.”  After weeks of asking the question “Is President Obama to be blamed for the market going down?”, now, when the DOW goes up 600 points for the week, Dana Perino’s Stepford Wife looking ass comes out and tries to stake some claim to the success to her old boss. I swear…the nerve of these assholes.